Monday, December 19, 2005

Insanely Freaking Busy!

No, I'm not dead I've just been so damn busy I can't see straight. First I was sick as hell for two weeks and ended up in the hospital, then the holiday mayhem started.

First of all, I want to know what freaking genius started the torture that is the "Company Holiday Party" tradition. As if everyone does not have enough crap to do around this time of year we have to spend extra time socializing with people we see for a minimum of eight hours every freaking day?!?! What asshole thought this was a good idea?

Yes...I really want to see the wackjob salesperson who I can't stand because he's a damn chauvinist even more than I already have to. Just to make it even more fun, why don't we throw a bunch of margaritas into the mix to see what new heights of assholeness this jackass can reach.

Oh, chauvinist salesperson... I really hope you get hit by a busload of angry women on their way to a pro-choice rally. It would serve you right.

Second...if you, the person in charge of the Company Holiday Party don't want to make reservations somewhere or decide not to have the party catered, you should be forced to make all the damn food yourself.

No, I wasn't planning on coming into work and spending the entire damn morning wrapping jalapenos and bacon around 25 lbs of shrimp, nor was I planning on slicing a gazillion avocados and onions so that you could make guacamole. What the fuck were you thinking? Shrimp and avocados does not a team building activity make. This is Houston...there are a thousand Mexican restaurants in any given four block radius...pick one and make a goddamn reservation, you moron!!!

Third...oh, Company Holiday Party Planning Guru...don't call me at the last minute and volunteer my services as the party DJ. I have a gazillion CD's, none of which you are going to want to listen to. Most of them are a bunch of random songs that I stuck on a CD and there is no rhyme or reason to it, nor do I label the damn things. Therefore, I am in no way responsible when someone picks a random CD that has no label on it out of my stash, puts it into the CD player and the party comes to a grinding halt when The Lords of Acid start chanting "Darling, come here, fuck me up the...". I got to the CD player and turned it off as fast as I could but I'm sure some of the little kiddies (who were NOT supposed to be there in the first place) are going to be warped for life. Tough shit, not my problem and stop staring daggers at me during the production meeting.

Okay, enough ranting for now. I should probably get some actual work related crap done, even though it seems that everyone I need something from in order to do my job has taken this week off.

I'll try to be better with the updates, but I make no promises until after the damn holidays.


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